Today was a happy day.

And it should have ended that way.

I should be blogging about the good things that happened today.

But I can't.

I failed my Marketing module. Which I shouldn't have. Now I have to retake that module. But this really isn't what I'm afraid of.

It's the money.

Though my brother said he'll help me pay for it, it's an amount of money that we really didn't have to spend, if I didn't fall into the scorpion's trap. I was really in a bad condition. It's actually considered a miracle that I managed to pass the other two. I really wasn't in the mood to study that week. How could I have been so dumb. So fucking dumb.

It's more heartbreaking than being heartbroken. Tears are falling more than they ever did. More than when he left the second time.

Family, friends and money matters most to me now. I no longer want any relationships. They ruin lives.

I really don't deserve anyone spending anymore money on me. I really don't.

Labels: swytnightmares